I’ve given myself a thankless task here. I know I can’t win. I know no matter what order I choose here it will be wrong – unless you’re around 25 years old and have a fantastic taste in music like myself, that is. Do you like Babymetal, Scooter and early noughties pop sensation A1? We’re going to get along just fine!
It’s ok, I can accept being wrong – it’s just how wrestling works. Whatever era was going on when your wrestling fandom either started or was at its peak, that’s the best era. There’s nothing anybody can say for you to think otherwise – even if your era was objectively awful. It’s the one you associate with the glory days of life when the biggest problems you had were making sure you had the latest Hasbro, or convincing your mother that wearing the latest DX t-shirt to school was a great idea.
With that in mind, no matter your age the best opening theme song for Raw is the one from your era of WWE – if your era came before January 1993, I apologise, you’re an anomaly and beyond any kind of medical help.
Most of the songs in this list are garbage, let’s be real here. But they’re our garbage and remind us of the good old days. Therefore, they’re absolutely amazing.
“I wish there was a way to know you were in the good old days before you actually left them.” Bernard, A (2013)
10. “Raw” By Jim Johnston
It’s a catchy tune, but I want more from my Monday Night Raw theme. This effort from the incredible Jim Johnston gives me something, but not quite enough to titillate my eardrums.
This slice of tuneage – with one of the most ingenious titles I’ve ever seen, by the way – is just too repetitive to be any higher than bottom place on this list. And speaking of bottom, is it just me or does this theme have a passing resemblance to the song that closes Rik Mayall and Ade Edmondson’s Bottom? (They don’t own the same arse, to clarify. I mean the closing theme to their TV show named as such.)
It is just me? I implore you to go and listen to them one after another. You what? ‘Go away’? Oh, ok then. But before I do and you read the rest of this list, please remember I’m nowhere near as bad a person as Michael Hayes. Don’t hate my opinions as much as you undoubtedly hate him.