10 Worst WWE T-Shirts

A truly great WWE t-shirt is the sort of thing you’re proud to wear - Austin 3:16. The nWo. Macho Man. Hot Rod. These are instant classics that have since become iconic and even penetrated the mainstream. 

Unfortunately for some WWE stars, they get saddled with designs that wouldn’t even penetrate the discount bin at the local discount store. 

Dishonourable mentions must go to Chris Jericho’s ‘Wanna-Bee’, Big Show's ‘Chicks Did it Big’, The Rock’s ‘Poontang Pie’, Trish Stratus’s ‘Blow Me…Into the Stratus Phere’, and the WWE Network ‘$9.99’ shirt. 

These are the 10 Worst Ever WWE T-Shirts!

10. Sin Cara

The story of the original Sin Cara’s WWE career was one of constant mistakes that resulted in massive disappointment. 

The high-flying luchador had, as Mistico, been a box-office sensation in his native Mexico and came to WWE amid much fanfare. Regrettably, his tendency to botch or mistime his moves, a Wellness Policy violation, and various injuries saw him fizzle out pretty quickly. 

WWE’s merchandise department also botched one of his t-shirt designs. The black t-shirt featured a picture of Sin Cara standing with his arms folded, his image having been altered so that he appeared in gold and silver. 

Unfortunately, the way the image was cut off, coupled with the placement of his entrance robe and the design of his tights made it look like he had a silver you know what. Completing the effect was the fact it looked like it was also ‘dripping’ at the bottom. 

Someone at WWE HQ soon realised and the company soon pulled the shirt from sale. 

9. John Morrison

There was a lot ‘cool’ things about John Morrison. He had a really cool head of hair and cool outfits. He had that cool slow-motion entrance with the fireworks. He did cool, Parkour-inspired moves in the ring. He did not have cool merchandise.

The worst of the bunch was this confusing piece of apparel that had a group of spray-painting monkeys – the ‘JoMosapiens’ – on the front and the phrase ‘We’re gonna eat your lunch’ on the back. 

According to Morrison himself (in a Reddit AMA), the phrase was actually his idea and was inspired by his childhood taekwondo instructor. 

The Shaman of Sexy noted that WWE’s merch people and even Stephanie McMahon told him the phrase was stupid, the monkeys were weird and that the t-shirt wouldn’t sell, but that only made Morrison want it more and insisted it be made. 

8. The Miz

The Miz is another WWE star who hasn’t exactly been blessed with wearable t-shirts, with awful shirts from Chick Magnet to Hello, I’m Awesome to Haters Love Me? 

Considering he’s been a consistent main roster presence for almost 20 years at this point, it’s actually quite impressive, in a way, that Mike Mizanin hasn’t had one piece of genuinely good WWE merch.

After Miz, Maryse and Matt Riddle got into an argument over testicle size on an episode of Raw in 2022, WWE decided to capitalise on the moment by releasing a t-shirt for Miz that was a new take on an old classic.

Now imagine, if you will, walking into any public space or social situation wearing a t-shirt that says 'HELLO, MY BALLS ARE MASSIVE.' As well as having to explain the context of the offensive bit of kit, you’re liable to find yourself explaining your attire to a law enforcement officer. 

7. Test

Test was the original man trying to get his balls over, though. 

As part of a storyline, Test’s then real-life girlfriend and on-screen manager Stacy Keibler was coming up with new marketing ideas to get her client to the next level. She figured that, since Hulk Hogan had his Hulkamaniacs and The Rock had his People, it made sense that Test would have his Testicles. 

To embed the new slogan deeper into the public consciousness, Keibler unveiled a t-shirt on Raw that said ‘I like my testicles’ on the front and ‘rub me the right way’ on the back.

Once again, just imagine yourself walking into any building or having to interact with another human being wearing a t-shirt that displays how fond you are of your own bollocks. 

6. Carlito

When Carlito burst onto the scene in 2004, he claimed to be the coolest guy ever. Whatever made Carlito cool, though, it wasn’t this t-shirt. 

In 2006, the former United States and Intercontinental Champion unleashed the garish yellow monstrosity that featured a bitten apple (with a face drawn on it) alongside the caption ‘Do you spit or swallow?’.

This could refer to an apple or the crude sexual innuendo that was commonly uttered in 2000s high schools. 

5. D-Generation X

As the man who once controlled all things WWE, Vince McMahon could have mandated that every t-shirt the company sold feature his likeness on it, if he so desired. As it is, there were only ever a couple of Vince McMahon t-shirts and not too many more Mr. McMahon pieces of merchandise outside of a couple of action figures. 

Vince was featured on one notoriously rubbish t-shirt thanks to D-Generation X. After a backstage segment in which McMahon was taunted with various distractions – including a rooster – WWE put this abomination up for sale. 

As well as having had one of the coolest tees of the Attitude Era, DX have also had a couple of cringe-worthy duds (including that one where the little cartoon Triple H and Shawn Michaels are mooning), but this was a new low. 

4. Chyna

Unfortunately for Chyna, she was a female during the Attitude Era and, thus, the shirts she was given were far from tasteful. A few of the earlier ones were emblazoned with the phrase ‘I’d rather be in Chyna’, which was tacky, but nothing compared to the confused atrocity she’d be tasked with promoting in 2000. 

While she was in the midst of a storyline romance with Eddie Guerrero, Chyna’s new t-shirt hit the market. On the front it said ‘Va-Chyna’ and on the back it said ‘Enter at your own risk’. 

WWE had a once-in-a-lifetime talent in Chyna, a massive star who could have been a merchandise machine, and this is the best they could come up with. 

3. Rikishi

One of the surprising successes of the Attitude Era was the emergence of Rikishi. 

Having flopped as Make a Difference Fatu and The Sultan, it was heartening to see the big man become one of the most popular acts in the company, thanks in large part to his association with Too Cool, their post-match dance routine and the fact that he rubbed his thong-clad backside in other people’s faces.

Rikishi knew what his moneymaker was and, evidently, so did WWE. Because they decided to release a t-shirt featuring it in all its glory. On the front you had the expression ‘Back dat ass up’ and, on the back, you had the bottom in question.  

2. The APA

In WWE storyline, the Acolyte Protection Agency – AKA the APA – were flush with cash after offering their services as backup to half the WWE roster. 

Bradshaw and Farooq were always getting into a scrap, whether it was in the ring, in the bar or backstage in their makeshift ‘office’. WWE decided to stress that fact, releasing this t-shirt. 

On the front it had the APA logo, which is fine, along with bar and grill which is innocent enough. In the middle, however, fans were treated to ALWAYS POUNDING ASS. 

While you can appreciate the intent, the WWE marketing people’s desire to have a phrase that worked with the letters APA had well and truly done them in. 

On the back of the shirt, the shirt stated that the rules of conduct are to KICK ass (after drinking beer and picking fights), which feels a little more appropriate (and certainly less inappropriate).

1. Val Venis

Val Venis was one of the most provocative and controversial WWE characters ever. The Big Valbowski entertained in creative vignettes, with creative promos and by being creative in the ring.

As well as some t-shirts that you totally couldn’t rock anywhere where there were other people – like that one of him looking practically orgasmic while wearing a towel or the one that said ‘Venis Envy’ in big letters – WWE gave Val the single worst and most embarrassing shirt of all-time.

Notoriously worn at WrestleMania 2000, the shirt said ‘I am cocked…’ on the front and ‘locked and ready to unload’ on the back. Tawdry enough on its own, but the font looked exactly like a certain white liquid.

Even by the low standards of the time, this was just awful. 

Amazingly, however, Sean Morley himself managed to release an even more embarrassing t-shirt, professing his transphobic beliefs with a design that says ‘Hello, biological ladies’.